I WAS RAY'D TODAY

NASHVILLE - OCTOBER 20, 2015

There is a certain phenomenon that occurs with more and more regularity with each passing day. I can’t necessarily remember when it first started happening. I’d imagine as early as mid-September back in 1990. My family and friends are aware of it and some have even witnessed it as it has unfolded right before their eyes.

At first, I was nearly always caught off guard when it would take place. Nowadays, I’m getting rather astute at identifying when it’s about to happen. Mostly these events are short and sweet, even pleasant. Other times, they are so over-the-top that they are forever seared into that part of one’s memory that never forgets. Here are a couple of those unforgettable times.

Recently, I was nearing the end of an unusually long, multi-city work trip. It was day 23 of my 27-day journey that included lots of airports, hotels, and rental cars. Anyone who has ever traveled even a few times knows the drill. I was fortunate enough to have The Chan along for ballast.

We were in Nashville wrapping up our final stop and had already caught a Titans/Dolphins football game that previous Sunday. On this particular day, we were going to take in some more Americana because that’s what we do. I was determined to attend the live weekly radio broadcast from the Grand Ole Opry.

While heading towards the iconic venue, I immediately recognized the telltale signs. I knew it was about to happen, yet again. Standing in front of a couple of ladies in their mid-forties I saw the stares and could hear their whispers. Steady yourself I thought, here it comes.

One of these sweet ladies with eyes wide opened turned to me and wondered, “Has anyone ever told you that you look just like that actor? You know, that guy?” It’s funny, most times people are sure they recognize me, but never quite know from where. Then there are those real movie buffs that know exactly who it is I remind them of.

I smiled and gently responded, “Do you mean Ray Liotta?” With self-satisfaction they always reply, “Yes! The guy from ‘Goodfellas,’ right?!” As I correctly predicted, I had just been “Ray’d.” This happens so frequently that the event has simply been converted to a single-word verb.

When Ray’d this time, it was the culmination of an exceptionally busy stretch making it the fourth time in six days. My earliest recollection of being Ray’d goes back to Christmas 1990. It makes sense now since Goodfellas was released that previous September. I’d conservatively estimate that it’s occurred at least a couple of hundred times over the years.

I will admit a certain vanity of mine does kick in. After all, Mr. Liotta is nearly 10 years older than me. I always ask the same thing. Is that good or bad? Every time they’ve reassured me, “Oh no, it’s good.”

These admiring inquisitors must’ve been big Ray fans because each had an ear-to-ear grin and one was blushing. I never know what to say or how to make an uneventful exit after being Ray’d, but these two clearly weren’t done with me or Mr. Liotta just yet. One of the lovely ladies continued, “We both know you are not him, but can we take our picture with you anyway?” An unrehearsed, “Uh, sure?” was all I could mutter.

Please don’t get me wrong. I’ve learned to take this with a smile and even be flattered, but there have been some strange exchanges over the years. Only one time did I ever find myself angry. I mean really ticked off.

I had rushed my daughter to an emergency room with severe breathing difficulties due to chronic allergies. My poor little girl was struggling. Outwardly, I was just as smooth and operative as anyone could hope their daddy would remain. Inside, I was doing my best to stay calm and focused. There I stood holding my daughter with her mom by my side.

Yep, there was the stare and now our nurse was saying something to another nurse. YOU GOTTA BE FREAKING KIDDING ME! NOT HERE! NOT NOW! I turned to my ex and said, “Oh my gosh, she’s going to Ray me?!” Sure enough, the nurse just had to interrupt my daughter’s triage to ask me if I’ve ever been told I look like Ray Liotta.

Let me say, I wasn’t always a smiling participant when I would get Ray’d. Early on, I got to where I would interrupt them mid-sentence. “Has anyone ever told you…” with eyes rolled I’d screech, “Yea, yea, yea, that I look like Ray Liotta? Yes!” I was a jerk and my then-wife nicely told me so.

She said I should never be rude no matter how many times I’ve heard that, because for them it was the first time they’d asked. She confirmed the quickest and sweetest response would simply be a smile and thank you. She was right, besides I like people and it isn’t in my nature to be dismissive or hurtful. Since her coaching, I am always sure to remain sweet and conciliatory.

So here’s this ER nurse Raying me and it took every ounce of restraint in my body, but I smiled and responded, “Yes, but can we get my daughter taken care of first?” Never a raised voice or demand on my part and the smile never left my face, but inside I was seething. This Ray Liotta guy was really starting to get on my nerves!

That of course, I say in jest. Trust me when I tell you I’m flattered by the recognition and even enjoy a good Raying every now and again. I’ve never really seen it, but even my closest friends tell me they think the comparison is uncanny. I guess it’s better than being “Buddy’d.” I’m sure Mr. Hackett was an amazing fellow, but a leading man he would never be confused for.